Clichés
by Phillippa of the Phoenix
Summary: After a year of him making puppy eyes at her and asking her to go out with him, Hermione might actually say yes and Draco might actually mean it. Plus, Parvati the Valley Girl.
1. Part One

Clichés  
by me (Phillippa)  
  
¤¤¤¤¤ Phillippa here ¤¤¤¤¤  
Here's my first HP fic, a Draco-Hermione one. I think it turned out pretty well. Review it and make me very very very happy!  
  
Disclaimer -- I do not have: rights to Harry Potter, a big enough room, clean socks on, a clean room, or my own Zen garden.  
  
part one (hermione)  
  
How is it that in movies when the "bad popular guy" falls for the "nice unpopular girl," he totally changes his whole life around to show her his feelings?  
  
That definitely isn't happening now.  
  
It would be so easy if he totally rearranged himself for me. I would be able to tell if he liked me or was just making fun of me if he did that.  
  
Yeah, me. I'm the other cliché here. A bookworm goody-two-shoes if there ever was one.  
  
Harry says he might not know what to do with his feelings for me and that's why he's being such a jerk. Harry, by the way, thinks this whole thing is hilarious. Ron seems to agree with me about him and what he is doing. Anyway, I said to Harry, "Well, he sure knows what to do with his feelings about her."  
  
She is his girlfriend.  
  
(groan.)  
  
I want to fit him into his cliché home and dismiss his actions as typical teenage want for attention. Except, I'm not sure if maybe he does like me.  
  
(several groans.)  
  
I'm not pretty. I know I'm not. Wild hair, awful skin, monster thighs and wide feet. I'm fairly short and don't like to wear tight clothes.  
  
Why couldn't he just hang out with her and leave me alone? I'm content enough without a boyfriend. I don't want or need one. I want to get another person to be interested in SPEW, I want to get into Advanced Arithmancy, I want to get all O's on my OWL's. MY life is complete right now without a boyfriend, especially him. Maybe the summer will make him lose interest in me, and come our seventh year, we can ignore each other, hate each other again.  
  
May they have an abnormally long relationship. May someone cast an irreversible spell on them so they are always connected. May she find out and get mad and make him stop.  
  
Go out with me, Hermione. . .go to Hogsmeade with me, Hermione. . .you're so hot, Granger. . .you should go out with Draco. . .Draco really likes you, Hermione. . .dance with me, Granger. . .  
  
No! No, no, no, no!  
  
I don't want to go out with him. I don't want to dance. I don't want to be in Hogsmeade with him. I don't want a boyfriend!  
  
I just want him to leave me alone and go bother her. After all, they are going out. . .  
  
(g r o a n. . .)  
  
----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- -----  
  
It's the last Hogsmeade weekend of the year. Ron and I are going without Harry, because he's going with Ginny instead. I finally convinced Harry to take her. It took the whole entire year, but it did work.  
  
He hasn't asked me yet.  
  
I can't understand why this bothers me. He is going with her, as far as I can tell. I should be delighted. I'm not. I hate it that I'm not. I want to be.  
  
Has "no" finally leaked into that thick skull of his? Has he finally realized that I don't want to go out with him, that I don't want to be his girlfriend? Did she finally catch him flirting with me in the back of Potions class and tell him off for it? I don't know, and it's driving me crazy.  
  
Could I actually like him?  
  
(groan.)  
  
Ron is worried about me. I'm antsy, I can't concentrate on my homework. Arithmancy isn't as interesting as it always was. I am starting to look forward to Potions classes.  
  
Could I actually like him?  
  
No! It's the end of the year jitters, it's going to my head. I'm only anxious because the exams are next week. . .not because he hasn't asked me to go to Hogsmeade with him like he did every other time. . .  
  
I couldn't actually like him. I couldn't actually be thinking about saying yes if he asks me if I'll go with him to Hogsmeade. No, no, no!  
  
Impossible. Not him, not my torturer of six years. Not the smirking, sneering, white-blond ferret! Anyone but him. I could take a crush on Seamus or Dean or even Neville. Even Ron! But not him!  
  
It's the stress! I don't have a crush on him! I couldn't like him just because he spent a year making puppy dog eyes at me when they should've been directed at her and smiling at me when he should've smiled at her and sitting near me in the library when he should've been with her. . .  
  
I couldn't actually like him. . .  
  
I must be going crazy, because I just might. . .  
  
(several groans)  
  
part two (draco)  
  
It all started out as a game. A game to annoy her. She was so fun to annoy. Her snappy comebacks and the way she blushed when I flirted with her made it all worth the trouble. It annoyed Pansy to no end, and annoying Pansy while annoying her was always a plus.  
  
I had to get used to saying her first name instead of her last name. I bought flowers for her once, but that wasn't as much fun. She threw them right in the trash and didn't even have the decency to look embarrassed.  
  
Pansy just about went crazy. "Draco!" she screeched. "What are you doing with that mudblood? You git! You are my boyfriend, stop flirting with Granger!"  
  
I'm afraid Pansy's little outburst did the opposite of what she intended it to do. I started to hang out in the library by her. I started to send her letters and chocolates and jewelry.  
  
It was -- in truth -- extremely fun. It was something interesting to do. Crabbe and Goyle stopped following me around everywhere. I received a letter home from Mother, who was confused by my change of friends. "I understand you are now in company with a certain witch you use to abhor," she wrote. "Do I know her parents?"  
  
I almost laughed at that. Mother -- knowing muggles? I wrote back that she most definitely did not know her parents, because she was an orphan, and no one knew who her parents were.  
  
Yeah, yeah, don't yell at me about a little white lie. I was keeping my outlet of fun safe.  
  
I felt like such a cliché -- classic bully move to lie about it. Usually I could boast to Mother about that kind of thing, but this was different. While I bothered Potty when I was bored, what was happening between her and I, it was not just happening when I was bored. It was practically a hobby.  
  
I was amazed by her strong will. She didn't eat one of the chocolates I got for her, she didn't read a single note, and she never even glanced at the necklaces and bracelets.  
  
I should tell her it's all a joke, I should stop flirting with her in the back of Potions. I should stop sitting in the library and watching her study. I really should. I know I won't be able to.  
  
What am I saying? I'm a Malfoy, I'm strong enough to conquer a weird feeling about her.  
  
Could I actually like her?  
  
She's been receiving torment from me for six years. She's best friends with Potter and Weasel. She's a Gryffindor. She's a bushy-haired, bossy, know-it-all mudblood.  
  
Could I actually like her?  
  
Impossible! It's all a joke, I don't really like her, I'm just confused because I've been acting like I do for the whole year.  
  
------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------  
  
The last Hogsmeade weekend is coming around. I haven't asked her if she'll go with me.  
  
Potty's going with Baby Weasley, so Brother Weasley and she are going to Hogsmeade alone this time. Why does this bother me, to have Weasel and her alone?  
  
Pansy (as usual) is dropping hints all over the place that she wants to go with me.  
  
I have to ask her first. Maybe she'll say yes this time. . .  
  
Draco Malfoy, you can't have just thought that. You're acting like you actually want her to say yes. . .  
  
Maybe I won't ask her this time. Maybe I'll just go alone and watch in agony as she and Weasel walk chummily through Hogsmeade.  
  
No! I do not have a crush on her. I don't care even if she and Weasley start to make out in front of me while I'm at Hogsmeade. I don't care if they are girlfriend and boyfriend! I sincerely, absolutely, without a doubt, do not care!  
  
I couldn't actually like her. . .   
  
I must be going crazy, because I just might. . .  
  
What do you think? I'm thinking about just leaving it at that and letting you decide what happens. Or should I keep going? Tell me what you think.   
  
A) I think you have to continue it  
B) I think it's fine as it is  
  
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	2. Part Two

Clichés by me (Phillippa)  
¤¤¤¤¤ Hey! ¤¤¤¤¤ I got eight votes to keep going with it, so here I go.  
  
Disclaimer -- I do not have: the rights to Harry Potter, a working tape player, hair that behaves, or my own tropical flower garden.  
  
chapter two (two days!)  
  
part one (hermione)  
  
Potions class usually goes a little like this:  
  
Professor Snape: Ten points off from Gryffindor for being late, Potter!  
  
Harry: (grumbles)  
  
Him: (laughs)  
  
Ron: (glares)  
  
Me: (sighs)  
  
Snape: Today we are going to learn to make a very powerful and extremely complex potion. . .  
  
Him: Hermione.  
  
Me: (listens to Snape drone on about the ingredients to the very powerful and extremely complex potion)  
  
Him: Hermione, you are so beautiful when you concentrate. Did you know that?  
  
Me: (concentrates beautifully on what Snape is saying)  
  
Him: The next weekend is a Hogsmeade weekend. Would you go with me?  
  
Me: (stands up and starts collecting the ingredients from Snape's desk)  
  
Him: (follows me around and bumps into me, conveniently making me drop the rarest ingredient there is in the potion)  
  
Snape: And another ten points from Gryffindor!  
  
Gryffindors: (groan and glare at him and Snape)  
  
This Potions class was different. Not completely different -- "Ten points off from Gryffindor for being late, Potter!" -- but he was very quiet through the whole thing. Not a word, not a flirt, not anything.  
  
Something's wrong.  
  
Maybe it has something to do with this being the last Hogsmeade weekend. Who knows. Why do I even care? It's driving me up the wall. Harry and Ron are both worried about me, but I don't know even what to tell them. I might have a crush on him? Like they would believe that. Eventually, they'll ask me what's bothering me, and I'll have nothing to tell them.  
  
It's Thursday. He has two days to ask me if I'll go with him. The longer he waits, the more I want to say yes and just find out what exactly he's doing. The longer he waits, the more agitated I become. . .  
  
part two (ron)  
  
I'm worried about Hermione. It took me a while to see that something was bothering her, but at least Harry didn't have to point it out to me. She's nervous all the time. Fidgeting, biting her nails, going to the library even more than usual. . .  
  
Something's wrong. Maybe it's just the end of the year. Exams and all, you know.  
  
Practically everyone thinks I still have a crush on her, but I don't think I do anymore. I don't feel all excited when I'm around her, or anything like that. Maybe it has something to do with Krum. . .she hasn't written him a letter lately. I'm glad I don't have to be jealous of Krum anymore. He really is a bloody awesome Seeker.  
  
It could be that Malfoy's bothering her. Harry thinks it's funny the way he's always trying to get Hermione to go out with him, but it freaks me out. I find it hard to believe that he coul despise her for six years and then -- bang! -- start to like her. The way I see it, there's something up that ferret's sleve.  
  
Hermione and I are going to Hogsmeade without Harry, because he finally asked Ginny if she would go with him. Maybe I'll ask her then. It's Thursday. . .that's two days to get up the nerve to ask her what's bothering her.  
  
Two days. . .hopefully that's enough time. . .  
  
part three (ginny)  
  
Oh! Two days, two days, two days! Two days until I go out on a date with Harry!  
  
I am calm, cool and collected.  
  
What am I going to wear? What am I going to say?  
  
I've known him for five years. Why am I nervous about what I'm going to say? I must be going crazy. Absolutely nutty.  
  
Oh, Merlin! Two days!  
  
I am calm, cool and collected.  
  
I owe it all to Hermione. She's been trying to convince him to do it for almost the whole year. I thought I might be over my fancy over Harry, but after Dean informed me he was sick of me making eyes at Harry on our dates, I realized I still liked him. Then, Hermione told me about Harry's disaster date with Parvati, and I began to feel a little hopeful. I thought, well, Harry isn't going out with anyone, I'm not going out with anyone, why not?  
  
Oh, Merlin. I thought I was going to die of happiness when Harry came up to me in the library and asked if I would go to the last Hogsmeade weekend with him.

Two days! What am I going to wear? All my clothes are second-hand, nothing seems worthy of my first date with Harry.

Two days! What am I going to do? I could always borrow something from one of the Gryffindor girls in my room, maybe Jean. What if Jean won't let me?

Merlin, what on earth will I do!  
  
I am calm, cool and collected.

Sorry I took so long. Hopefully you will forgive me. My computer was "on the fritz" (not working) so I couldn't update.

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	3. Part Three

Clichés

by me (Phillippa)

Please forgive me for neglecting this story! I have been so . . . neglectful! I am ashamed. I like how this turned out a lot. Especially Parvati's narration.

Thanks to my reviewers . . .

Black Petalzzz (NO! Don't throw away the rubber ducks! I would have . . . rubber blood on my hands! Oh! the guilt!)

slytheringurl-050614

Bea

S.S.Pan

Little Eirtae (sorry, but Draco does not carry her off into the forest. He really wanted to, but I didn't let him)

darkmonkey

Em Crosthwaite

Miss Piratess (so really. . .shouldI stick to fairy tales or was this not so bad?)

hufflepuffgirl88

malista

american-born-confused-desi

Disclaimer -- I do not have: the rights to Harry Potter, any athletic ability, the Moulin Rouge soundtrack I want SO MUCH, or my own tropical flower garden. Which is a bummer, because I could do with some athletic ability. Truly.

chapter three (the end)

part one (harry)

The chessboard was set, but Ron was far too busy to play. "Awfully sorry, Harry, but you know Hermione. She'll skin me alive if she finds out I haven't done my part in the research."

"Yeah, I know," I sighed. The black queen gave me a scornful look as Ron scurried off to the library. "You heard him. He can't play, and no one else will." I groaned. I was talking to a chess piece. As if I wasn't all ready convinced I was going mental.

"I'll play with you, Harry," Ginny said, suddenly appearing in the Common Room. "I'm not as good as Ron, but no one is."

"Oh. . . Ginny. Hi." I felt stupid. I always felt stupid around Ginny now, and I could never find the right words to say. I felt myself heating up.

"Unless you don't want to," Ginny blurted. "I mean, we don't have to. I just thought, since Ron couldn't --"

"No," I said suddenly. Ginny looked confused, about to move but hesitating. "I mean, yes. Let's play." I sat down. She sat down. We smiled at each other and the nervousness left me.

------------------------------------------------------------

Even after getting seriously trounced, I didn't want Ginny to leave. "Another game?" I suggested as the pieces righted themselves and put themselves back together.

"I don't know, Harry. I've got some Potions homework to do that I haven't even started on yet . . ."

"Oh, okay, then, Gin. I'm fine with that," I said. After all, even if I was going to go to Hogsmeade with her, I didn't want to seem -- well, desperate.

"Maybe -- tomorrow, you reckon?" Ginny asked half-heartedly as she stood up.

"Maybe," I said, motioning for the pieces to pack themselves into the box. I know it's going to sound like I'm mental, but I **swear** the black queen winked at me, like she was encouraging me to say something else to Ginny.

Ginny was slowly taking her materials out of her bag, her back facing me. I felt lousy. Even if I had asked her out, I still felt like it wasn't enough. What more could I do?

"Gin?" I said cautiously.

"What?" Her voice was -- funny, almost like she was crying or something -- oh, I was a lousy boyfriend! Er -- sort of boyfriend.

"Ginny, I promise we'll play chess tomorrow." She turned around, and I noticed she wasn't crying. "Or -- or do something else if you like. Quidditch?"

"Oh, Harry. I don't care what we do, I just want to feel like -- like we're friends, too."

I reached out and held her hand. "Not just friends, Ginny." She smiled a little then, and I knew everything was okay.

part two (parvati)

Okay, I know this sounds, like, gossipy, but I've always been able to tell my secrets. Like, I didn't care if everyone knew I liked some guy. Or like, if I failed a DADA test or something. You know?

So it's weird to have, like, a secret. Like, I'm betraying Padma and Lavender somehow. But, like, this one's different. Way different. 'Cause, like, when it was Dean or someone like that, I could, like, care less if he knew. Besides, like, that was just, like, a crush -- nothing really, like, important or anything.

I like Ron Weasley. Like, a lot. Like, too much.

It all started, like, in fourth year at the Yule Ball. I know he, like, didn't have really cool dress robes or anything, but suddenly -- it was like I got hit with, like, Cupid's arrow or something. POW!

A couple days after, Padma and Lavender were all, like, making fun of him, like, his old robes and all, and I forced myself to laugh. But inside, I was, like, "Don't you talk about him that way!" That's when I knew it wasn't, like, a normal crush. 'Cause I, like, _cared_ about him instead of just, like, liking him.

I know. It sounds dumb. But it's, like, the truth. I didn't tell a soul. It was, like, serious all of a sudden if anyone, like, knew. Padma thought it was _Harry_ that I liked. Ha! Everyone's, like, at some point, liked him. But not me.

But did I, like, try to correct her or anything? No. I just let her make her little, like, match-making plans. And look where that got me! Like, on a date. With his best mate. (I should tell Lavender I've finally found my, like, inner poet or whatever.)

It was, like, pure torture, and I'm not kidding or anything. I ended up botching that one, like, really bad. But, still, I was, like, there is no way I'm gonna tell his mate that I like him! That's, like, way worse than telling Padma or Lavender. So, meanwhile, I, like, suffer while he doesn't even notice me.

But, like, not for long. Lavender's been looking, like, not too hot lately. I can, like, convince her she should stay from classes rather easily. Then, in, like, Potions, where we always work in groups, I can, like, get Ron to come work with me. But how? I've got to, like, talk to him. Make sure we're, like, kind of like mates. Then, he won't be all like "Why would I sit with Parvati?" or anything. He's not in, like, the Common Room. I'll bet he's, like, in the library. Like, off to the library I go!

part three (draco)

Why is it always Potions class? Why, I ask you! Nothing used to happen there, save Snape having some fun with Gryffindor points. Now it seems that everything is doomed to happen there!

Okay -- so I like pressure. Always wait to the last day to study or right a long paper. Don't practice the day before a Quidditch match. Some might call me lazy or a procrastinator (now that I think of it, many do, especially adults) but that's not it. I just really like pressure.

So, it's Friday, only one day and no more chances to go with her to Hogsmeade until next year -- when she'll probably be Head Girl and become more bossy than she all ready is. This is it, Draco. Prepare yourself.

I watch her as she comes in with them, purposely not looking in my direction. They start to sit down, only Weasley's looking at another Gryffindor girl, P-something, the one with the twin sister. She's sitting alone, because (presumably) whomever she sits with is sick. And she's motioning for Weasley to come and sit with her . . . and he does!

Well, this is certainly a development.

Potter and Hermione end up sitting right ahead of Goyle and me. She looks back at me, a fleeting glance. I grin a small and (hopefully) malevolent grin. Hermione turns around quickly. Meanwhile, Snape is directing everyone to come and get the supplies. I don't even have to look at Goyle, he knows it's his job. With the unfailing Malfoy luck, Potter gets up to get the ingredients as well!

My heartbeat is a lot faster than it usually is. I have officially gone mental. I am excited about being sort of alone with her.

Prepare yourself for disappointment, Draco. She'll just say no like every other time. Wait . . . is she smiling? Just a little? Malfoy luck, don't fail me now!

"Hermione, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?" Weird. I was all set to demand that she come, and it came out wimpy, in a question. Like it's **her** decision! Okay, so it is, but come on. We've got the Malfoy image to keep up here. Not that dating a muggle-born brainiac doesn't completely mar the Malfoy image all ready.

She is turning around to face me! She's smiling at me! You're getting your hopes up, Draco, she's only doing it so she can rub her 'no' in your face. Oh, please say yes! Malfoy luck, Malfoy luck, Malfoy luck --

"Yes."

May I quote? Thank you.

"That's all, folks. Draw your own conclusions." And no amount of begging will coax me into a sequel. Yes, you'll all murder me for it, but I like it better this way. And after all, I am the writer.

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